dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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