we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
Randomize
