then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Randomize
