Do you still have your period?
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
