So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
Randomize
