You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
Randomize
