i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Randomize
