I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
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