You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
