I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
Randomize
