how can u be prego again
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
