i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
Randomize
