Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Randomize
