should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Randomize
