What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
But we have bathrooms and they dont
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
