Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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