Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
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