I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
This toilet bowl is my home.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
