I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
