Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Randomize
