I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
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