My brain says no but my pants say off.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
