I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
P.S. I can't hear my feet
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
