So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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