Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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