He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
Why did my mother make you get naked?
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
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