She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
Randomize
