is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
My dad is sitting where you rode me
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize
