so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
Randomize
