Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
