miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize
