I cannot find my penis.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
You took a bar mat shot.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Randomize
