Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
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