forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
Randomize