Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
