.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
