Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
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