brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
I just checked and if you bring a picture of your ex they will shred it and give you a free 'hater shot'. Would it be too much to print off one of their wedding pictures and bring it?
I really love that you're not going the 'why am I not married and having a kid yet?' route, but rather 'thank god I dodged that bullet'
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