Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
