Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
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