stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
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