Rock
Scissors
Fuck
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
True college students do jello shots in the library
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
