In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Randomize
