Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Randomize
