i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
