Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize
