i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
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