The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
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