You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Randomize
