I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
Randomize
