I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize